By @LOLGOP

LOL Of The Week: The GOP Gives Itself An Intervention

November 18, 2012 3:29 pm Category: Memo Pad, Politics 19 Comments A+ / A-
LOL Of The Week: The GOP Gives Itself An Intervention

When a drug addict gives himself an intervention, it usually goes like this: “Okay, I’m totally quitting after this next hit.” And you know what happens next.

A real intervention — like the ones we enjoy on reality TV — involves the people who care about the addict getting together with a professional to force a “bottom” with consequences if the addict will not seek help immediately. The real problem for the GOP is that the only people interested in intervening are also on the junk.

Let’s be honest: The GOP isn’t even at its bottom.

That was 2008.

They lost the presidency and became a nearly insignificant minority in the House and the Senate after the late Senator Arlen Specter (D-PA) switched parties. Then, in a mere two years, they won back the House and nearly the Senate. And that victory only fueled their delusion.

Republicans thought they won because people were rejecting “big government,” though they’d also savaged the president for cutting Medicare. But in November of 2010, the unemployment rate was 9.6 percent and rising. What Americans were really rejecting was the lingering aftermath of the Bush-era financial crisis — a disaster that King Midas couldn’t have fixed quickly enough.

Still, the GOP took their landslide victory as a sign that their ideas/addiction were working. They just needed to double down, veer to the right, defund Planned Parenthood, demand women have unnecessary ultrasounds, deregulate Wall Street again and repeal Obamacare three dozen times.

And if they were going to nominate an “electable” candidate for president in 2012, they were going to damned well make sure he’d adopted all of their most extreme views before they let him out into the general election.

Now, after the “electable” guy has lost, they attack him for making an excuse that is—like what Republican Senate candidate Richard Mourdock said about pregnancies from rape being a “gift”—the party line inartfully conveyed.

Yes, Mitt Romney said that President Obama only won because he’d been generous with “gifts” to his constituency. What else was Mitt going to tell his donors? “I hired smug fools who only told me I what I wanted to hear”?

Since Mitt made that sneering comment, GOP presidential frontrunners for 2016 have lined up for their chance to whack him.

But the more “serious” thinkers in the GOP aren’t just distancing themselves from Mitt Romney, they’re digging a little deeper.

“The ground game is really important, and we have to be, I mean we’ve got to give our political organizational activity a very serious… proctology exam,” former Mississippi Governor Haley Barbour said, during a panel at the Republican Governors Association. “We need to look everywhere.”

LOL.

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LOL Of The Week: The GOP Gives Itself An Intervention Reviewed by on . When a drug addict gives himself an intervention, it usually goes like this: “Okay, I’m totally quitting after this next hit.” And you know what happens next. A When a drug addict gives himself an intervention, it usually goes like this: “Okay, I’m totally quitting after this next hit.” And you know what happens next. A Rating:

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Comments

  • Mimi2kool

    I don’t know if the GOP needs an intervention as much as it needs an enema. Most of its members are so full of it. Life must be hard when you suffer from Anal-Cranial Inversion.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Don-Ramsey/100001577804530 Don Ramsey

    Little Bobby Jindal is the most rediculous, and hypocritical, of all the GOPers giving advice on change. This year he signed into law measures that include leagalizing the teaching of creationism, and the idea that the KKK were really good guys,(on the taxpayer dime), and one of the most restrictive anti-abortion laws in the country. Gottta love those GOPers.

    • Mimi2kool

      It’s a tough job, but someone has to do it. As long as it isn’t me…

    • Michael Kollmorgen

      We should give the DOE more power to circumvent state power in allowing creationism to be allowed to be taught in public schools.

      We are ONE country that should have only one standard for school curriculum, this is especially true in science classrooms.

      Since all of us support our public schools, I want our children to be taught with the best available factual information in science subjects, not spooky god-centered garbage.

      Creationism has NO place in a science classroom.

  • ORAXX

    Win or lose, Republicans have taken the same message from every election cycle for the last thirty years, namely, the need to turn even further to the right and go for more ideological purity.

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/PMVMZMDLRQL3TRK5RNOHJVZPHU stoptheinsanity

    The Republicans are a bloviating, narcissistic, self-delusional party that continues to fade into insignifcance because they haven’t and they still don’t get it. In analyzing reasons for their failure in the national elections, many believe that the problem simply was a failure to communicate their ideas and policies in an effective manner. The problem in not in the communicating of their ideas. The problem is in the ideas themselves. Republicans are still delusional in believing that all of the ideas and policies that their party has enacted and embraces are the right ones for this country. This election shows the repudiation of these ideas and policies supported by a majority of Americans. And who are Republicans putting up front as the new faces of the Republican party for the next presidential election? People like Jindal, Christie, and Rubio. Are you kidding me? All of these politicians embrace the same extremist agenda of the Republican party which led to its downfall in this election cycle. Repackaging extremist candidates as the “new” Republican party is a nonstarter and doomed for failure. The demographics of the voting populace in our country has dramatically changed and will continue to do so. Republicans certainly have a very strange way of trying to appeal to all demographics after their very stunning defeat. McCain and Graham start by making accusations and charges of possible crimes in the Benghazi incident against the president and Susan Rice and call for Watergate-type hearings when there is not one iota of evidence to support their accusations. Mitt Romney confirms his repudiation of 47% of Americans statement behind closed doors with his most recent comment. Romney believes that Obama won the election because he gave his supporters gifts. Boehner and Cantor remain defiant in their willingness to raise taxes on the rich even though a majority of Americans, 60%, want to raise their taxes. They are out to protect and defend the rich and remain loyal to their Grover Norquist pledge and don’t, at all, care about enacting the will of the American people. Republicans, what a “fine” start you’ve made thus far to try to appeal to the diverse American electorate! NOT!!!

  • Michael Kollmorgen

    I’d say the GOP is suffering from a Terminal Case of Cerbralrectalitis. Putting it as Politically Correct as I can:)

    What bothers me most about this is that regardless how one looks at it, the American Public nearly elected a complete dimwit with lots of money and the backing of the very religion which despised him, namely Christianity backing a Antichrist Mormon Bishop.

    What does it speak of the American Public, be it a minority since they lost, and not by much.

    We got a lot more problems than people like Romney. If we almost elected him, what does that say about us?

    • Sand_Cat

      I had some friends who called it a “cranial-rectal inversion.”

  • http://www.facebook.com/dominick.vila.1 Dominick Vila

    The comments that have been made by prominent Republicans since the election, including overt rejection of Mitt Romney’s conclusions, suggest there is a lot of soul searching going on. I disagree with most Republican foreign and domestic policies, but I am not among those who think they are ruthless or immoral. There is nothing wrong with having different ideas on how to solve a common goal. Their problem is that they allowed the most radical elements of the party to control the agenda and political platform. Considering how many Tea Paarty members were rejected on 11/6, and the reaction of a plurality of American to the political agenda and proposals in the GOP platform and the Romney-Ryan discourse throughout the campaign, I expect the GOP to move to the center-right to save the party. No political party can survive by embracing values that appeal only to one segment of the population. The GOP catered to middle age and elderly white males, evangelicals and the most extreme elements in our society, and they paid for it.

    • http://profile.yahoo.com/UHE4MJP5FHMFIEAOGEQHETUGDQ Rvn_sgt6768

      The real question then Dominick is can they get back to the center? I do not see it happening on the Party level but I do see individuals out of political necessity moving ever so slightly center. I also think it will take a long time. If not for the gerrymandering, which kept the house Republican, which will impede this progress of which we speak because they will mistakenly believe there is no need to move center. How I wish the election results would have been without this gerrymandering because we would get a true picture of how much the populace rejects Republican ideas and policies (except for the fringe tea party of course).

  • Jim Lou

    The GOP is no longer a party to the right of center. It is now a party to the far right.

    Many of the centrists and moderates have been driven to the sidelines. Look at Senator Snow of Maine.

    Unless the GOP opens its doors to others and tries to be more inclusive then it is going to be hard for them.

    • http://profile.yahoo.com/UHE4MJP5FHMFIEAOGEQHETUGDQ Rvn_sgt6768

      Exactly Jim, these are the people who stayed home that Romney thinks did not get their message. They got the message all right but understood they could not support it and didn’t want to support a Democrat either, at least not openly. Right now they have no party and the Libertarians do not offer them much either. Will they stay on the sidelines in the future or will they become Democrats when they realize that the Democratic party is ore aligned with their views on most issues? They need a champion to rescue them and take back the Republican Party from the far right fringe element.

  • Constant Comment

    The GOP might be able to succeed in regulating their tone, but they’ll never be able to change the fundamental tenets of their party platform or the bigotry that drives them. It’s who they are. It’s like asking the Catholic Church to change their minds on gays, women and protecting children. Ain’t gonna happen.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Kermit-Gagne/100000845128170 Kermit Gagne

    republicans are history –thanks to romney oh mccain helped also –gawd where are these people comming from –?

  • Sand_Cat

    The problem clearly is that far too many Republicans have been giving themselves far too many proctological exams for far too long, not that they need another one.

    • ralphkr

      Well, Sand_Cat, there is always the fear that a proctology just might accidentally result in a Republican’s ears being cleaned out and he might hear something other than the s–t put out by Faux News, Rush, etc. that has his ears plugged now.

  • m8lsem

    Free enterprise: freedom to pollute; freedom to exploit workers; freedom to cheat; freedom to deceive customers; freedom to poison; freedom to make another buck and Devil take the serfs, excuse me, voters. Just sing the siren song of freedom, and rejoice when the market conditions of the second half of the 1800’s return.

  • howa4x

    Tha GOP is about to have an inter party war between the moderates that think the tea party caused them to loose the election and the tea party that think Romney strayed too far from their message. This is why some like Jindel say you have to change the message and Cruz who thinks the message needs to be stronger. I think the republicans will go through 1 more national election with a loosing result. The reasons are, 1 the tea party controls the nomination process, so no moderate will get elected, 2 the ultra right owns the national microphone through talk radio types like Limbaugh, Beck, and Fox and friends types, Coulter, Huckabee, Palin, and O’Reiley. 3 The red states will carry on the war on women’s reproductive rights, enact anti immigration polices, and an unwillingness to implement Obama care, which hurts all the uninsured. 4 big donors like the Koch bros want a rightest agenda and are willing to pay for it. 5 a steadfast denial of climate change, in the wake of more and more natural disasters. The party still has an anti intellectual bent and is anti science at their base level. None of these groups are going to give in. Some even think they are doing gods work. The party still won’t appeal to single women, anyone in their 20’s, latinos, Afro Americans , gays, and Asians, and anyone who can think it through. Republicans come across as older white males trying to turn back the clock, and as long as that veiw of them stays the worse it’s going to be for them, not matter how much money they throw around.

  • Onofre Galvez

    I read that Jindal Article, and that quotation at the beginning was taken out of context. He was talking about how the Democratic party was able to portray the Republican party as “the party of big business, big banks, big Wall Street bailouts, big corporate loopholes, big anything.” The article was more about how the Republican party’s election methods were flawed, and did not reflect the actual beliefs and ideologies of the party.

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