Tag: fox debate
Debate Memo: Who’s In, Who’s Out, And What To Expect

Debate Memo: Who’s In, Who’s Out, And What To Expect

It’ll be a night of drama: Donald Trump vs. Jeb Bush; everyone else vs. Donald Trump; and probably Donald Trump vs. the moderators. And at the early debate, someone there will just be trying to break out of the minor leagues and get signed to the majors.

But beyond that, every candidate could have something to gain, or something to lose. It’s going to be a dramatic night.

The first Republican presidential debates of the 2016 race are happening Thursday night in Cleveland — there will be a primetime debate featuring the top 10 GOP candidates according to national polls as determined by debate host Fox News, and seven other Republican candidates who will participate in a separate debate airing while most of the country is at work or on the way home.

Here’s what you need to know, and what to expect from the GOP candidates.

Round One: The Minor League Debate

Rick Perry
Who: Former Texas governor and speaker of the “oops” moment heard round the world, Perry began wearing glasses as a campaign strategy, referred to the Charleston shooting as an “accident,” and once likened opposition to LGBT rights to Texas governor Sam Houston’s refusal to support or join the Confederacy. Also, he was indicted on two felony counts.

What to expect: He will hopefully remember his talking points this time.

Continue reading: 5 Things You Need To Know About Rick Perry

Rick Santorum
Who: Former Pennsylvania senator who, despite being sympathetic to creationismscience,” told the Pope (who is a scientist) to leave “science to the scientists.”

What to expect: He likes to play the underdog.

Bobby Jindal
Who:Louisiana governor and Duck Dynasty devotee, who announced his candidacy with an avant-garde short film, Jindal once participated in an exorcism in college, is staunchly opposed to gay marriage, and wants to abolish the Supreme Court.

What to expect: He’ll probably make a big deal about “religious liberty” (read: discrimination).

Continue Reading: 5 Things To Remember About Bobby Jindal

Carly Fiorina
Who: Former Hewlett-Packard CEO who lost an election for a Senate seat in 2010, Fiorina is the only woman in the Republican race, but happens also to be opposed to equal-pay, is big into cybersecurity, and is concerned about men watching porn at work.

What to expect: She will take senseless potshots at Hillary Clinton.

Lindsey Graham
Who: South Carolina senator whose gambit for internet stardom was a video of him mutilating his own cellphone, Graham also said Hillary Clinton could not be trusted because her husband lied about an affair.

What to expect:Resentment that he isn’t at the big-boys table.

George Pataki
Who: Former New York governor who is pro-choice and pro-gun control.

What to expect: He will try to play the Giuliani card and invoke 9/11, while everyone else wonders what exactly he’s doing at the GOP debate.

Jim Gilmore
Who: Uh… one sec. Let’s see here. Former Virginia governor, apparently.

What to expect: People to ask, “Who?”

Continue reading: Round Two: The Primetime Showdown!

Round Two: The Primetime Showdown

Donald Trump
Who: Real estate mogul, mouthpiece of the GOP id, loudmouth “birther,” and reality TV star who’s been doing well in national polls — not so well with people of color, veterans, immigrants, mainstream Republicans, or the Republican Party in general; refers to self in the third person; likes to talk about walls.

What to expect: He will not attack anyone unless he is provoked.

Continue Reading: 5 Reasons Donald Trump Is The Republican Party5 Reasons America Needs Immigrants More Than It Needs Donald Trump, and 21 Questions For Donald Trump

Jeb Bush
Who: Former Florida governor with a checkered historybaby brother and son of former presidents; has made a series of gaffes on domestic policy issues, women’s health, the Iraq War; also just has an awful lot of bad ideas; spells his name with an exclamation point.

What to expect: He’ll have to try very hard to protect his tenuous status as the frontrunner-whose-name-is-not-Trump.

Continue Reading: Jeb Bush’s 5 Worst Ideas So Far, 4 Things To Remember About Jeb Bush, and Jeb Bush’s Ethical Blind Spot

Scott Walker
Who: Union-busting, anti-choice Wisconsin governor, Walker has polled well and his SuperPAC raised more than $20 million in its first quarter — from under 300 donors; thinks ultrasounds are cool.

What to expect:: He will get fooled again.

Continue Reading: 6 Things To Know About Scott Walker and What Democrats Should Fear Most About Scott Walker

Mike Huckabee
Who: Former Arkansas governor, conservative Christian, and evangelical favorite, Huckabee recently said President Obama’s nuclear deal with Iran was like marching Israelis “to the door of the oven,” a very subtle reference to the Holocaust.

What to expect: He’ll invoke his four pillars: God, guns, grits, and gravy.

Ben Carson
Who: Carson, a retired neurosurgeon with no political experience, at some point in June was somehow leading a poll. He’s says fixing the economy, by cutting taxes, is the best way to address poverty; compared Obamacare to  9/11, Nazi Germany, and slavery; really hates pork.

What to expect: He might speak a little faster than usual and try to beat you at a board game.

Ted Cruz
Who: Texas senator with some serious SuperPAC muscle behind him (they’ve raised a combined $37.83 million, with the biggest individual donor to any SuperPAC thus far giving $11 million, and another individual giving $10 million); staunch opponent of same-sex marriage.

What to expect: He’ll shout about same-sex marriage “infringing” on Americans’ religious freedom.

Marco Rubio
Who: Florida senator and son of immigrants, Rubio has been seen by some as a frontrunner. His campaign and outside supporters have raised some $45 million, but…

What to expect: He will duck a question about his personal finances.

Rand Paul
Who: Kentucky senator and son of former GOP presidential candidate and libertarian luminary Ron Paul, Rand is a Tea Party favorite. Unfortunately for him, the head of his SuperPAC was indicted the day before the debate on charges of violating campaign finance laws related to Ron Paul’s 2012 campaign.

What to expect: He’ll go off about his “flat tax.”

Chris Christie
Who: Bombastic, ethically challenged, “combat ready” New Jersey governor widely known for the Bridgegate scandal (to say nothing of the several other reasons he should really not be president); enemy of teachers, commuters, and Bruce Springsteen; put his arm around Obama once and got lambasted for it.

What to expect: He will to tout his record as a twice-elected Republican governor in a heavily Democratic state, and not to keep his voice down as he “tells it like it is.”

Continue reading: 8 Reasons Chris Christie Shouldn’t Be President (Other Than Bridgegate)

John Kasich
Who: Ohio governor, former Lehman Brothers honcho, and renowned “ass kicker,” noted for his anger management issues, and for bucking the conservative trend by expanding Medicaid in his state and standing down to unions, Kasich slipped into the top 10 after being one of the last candidates to enter the fray

What to expect: It’s his opportunity to introduce himself to Republican voters as a sensible, credible, and competent candidate with an enviable hometown advantage in a crucial swing state.

Continue Reading: 5 Things To Remember About John Kasich and The Kasich-Walker Debate

Illustration: DonkeyHotey

Republicans Get Ready For The Debate Circus

Republicans Get Ready For The Debate Circus

It’s the big day: The first Republican primary debates — two of them — will be aired on Fox News Thursday night. So what are the candidates doing to get ready?

Fox is hosting two debates, just to accommodate an unprecedented field of contenders. The first (5 p.m. ET) is for the bottom seven candidates in the national polls — an event that has been variously described as the “kids’ table,” the “minor league,” or the “warmup debate.” (And one of the participants is also trying to popularize another name, as shown below.)

Then at 9 p.m. comes the main event: the primetime debate for the top 10 candidates — most notably Donald Trump, who sits comfortably at no. 1 in the polls through a combination of celebrity and sheer bellicosity. And everyone is preparing for the debate in their own way.

Several candidates in the both the major- and minor-league showdowns appeared in a video for IJReview, showing their pre-debate rituals: Jeb Bush calls his mom; Marco Rubio talks to Siri; Carly Fiorina plays solitaire on her phone; Scott Walker puts his phone down and goes jogging — and George Pataki seems to be auditioning for a Snapple commercial.

But the best nugget from a main debate competitor belongs to Ben Carson: “I take these hundreds of pieces of paper, because they have all the advice that people have given me about what to say during the debate — and light them on fire. I’m gonna be me. So whatever comes out, it’s me.”

And from the opening act debate, Lindsey Graham: “I take my new phone — thanks to The Donald — I listen to Motown, to mellow me off.”

Trump himself appeared Tuesday night on The O’Reilly Factor, after the debate lineup was announced, and said that his strategy for the debate will simply be to be himself (it’s worked so far!) — while at the same time saying that he wouldn’t necessarily single out other candidates (like Jeb Bush, for example) and attack them.

“I don’t know if I’d do that. I want to be right down the middle. I want to talk about policy, I want to talk about the wall, I want to talk about illegal immigration. I want to talk about bad trade deals. I may say that I can negotiate deals better than any of these folks — I did write The Art of the Deal, I built a phenomenal business, as you know — and you know, I have certain abilities that they do not have.”

But of course, if other candidates attack him, then he’ll just have to hit them right back.

Ben Carson also spoke to O’Reilly on Wednesday night, and did admit one accommodation he’ll have to make for the debate: Because of the time limits, he will talk a little faster than usual.

Meanwhile, Lindsey Graham is promoting the warmup debate as the real one to watch for substance — because Donald Trump won’t be in it. (Because if there’s a debate that doesn’t matter, it’s the one with the guy who’s leading in all the polls.) And Graham is even trying to sell a new hashtag for the 5 p.m. event: the “Happy Hour Debate.”

Some other “Happy Hour” candidates are also promoting it as a serious debate — though a bit more subtly, and without directly talking about The Donald. Take this tweet from Rick Perry, the man who came in 11th place in the polls and just missed out on that last podium for the main event:

Photo: Elephants performing at the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus at the Scottrade Center in St. Louis, Missouri, November 8, 2008. (via Wikimedia Commons)

Late Night Roundup: The ‘Trump Debate-Bot & Casino 5001’

Late Night Roundup: The ‘Trump Debate-Bot & Casino 5001’

One topic truly dominated the late night comedy shows on Wednesday: the anticipation of the Republican debate Thursday night, and the presence of Donald Trump.

Conan O’Brien revealed that Republicans are preparing for tonight’s debate by using a special high-tech device: the “Trump Debate-Bot & Casino 5001.”

Conan also showed a wacky promo for “The Other Republican Debate,” featuring the bottom seven candidates.

Larry Wilmore gave a heartfelt thanks to Jon Stewart, as Jon prepares to finish his remarkable run on The Daily Show, for all that he did to help Larry’s own career — and then, Larry got to talking about Trump and the debate, and all the crazy stuff that the other Republicans have to do just to get some attention. But Larry also gave a serious warning: It might be that The Donald is just like the Joker — he just wants to watch the world burn — and the joke could soon be on all of us.

Seth Meyers offered a sneak preview of the Republican debate — with one of his writers who went campaigning for The Donald in New York City.

Meanwhile, Jon Stewart opened up his second-to-last show with a look back at his brutal eviscerations of bad guys over the years — though as Jon discovered, a really good pun doesn’t exactly defeat ISIS, fix American racism, punish the big banks, or take down Fox News: “What the @#$% is going on here! God damn it! The world is demonstrably worse than when I started! Have I caused this?!?”

But at least Jon still does have one thing that’s getting better: The New York Mets.

The Daily Show crew also promoted Jon’s upcoming final show with a special segment: “A Look Back — A Man Who Was On TV.”

Donald Trump, The Swaggering Blond Supervillain Of The GOP

Donald Trump, The Swaggering Blond Supervillain Of The GOP

Back in 1957, when Donald Trump and I were both in middle school, I used to have this running argument with my grandfather, Bill Connors. A retired railroad worker and a drinking man, Pop lived in Elizabethport, New Jersey, a couple of blocks from where the tracks running down Broadway ended at the harbor.  

When visiting grandchildren proved too much for the old man, he’d retreat to his linoleum-floored front room and watch pro wrestling on his little black-and-white TV. As long as I’d keep still and fetch his beer, he’d let me stay. Sitting there with a spittoon at his feet and a cold one in his hand, Pop sometimes got agitated at the choreographed antics on the screen.

See, like millions of Republicans seemingly enchanted by Donald Trump’s updated impersonation of Dr. Jerry Graham, the swaggering blonde supervillain of the old World Wide Wrestling Federation, the old man believed the contests were for real.

If I wanted to keep watching—and I was already what Trump would call a HUGE fan of the Graham Brothers, Johnny Valentine, Ludwig von Krupp, and the other posturing bleach-blonde villains of the era—I had to be careful how I acted.

In his day, the old man had been a legendary brawler.

“Grandpa,” I’d say, “you’ve been in fights. A guy gets slammed over the head with a chair, it’s over.”

The old man would growl something about the cheating SOBs and the damn referees, as if my smart-aleck attitude would spoil all the fun. Back home, my pals and I had constructed our own wrestling ring, and actually dyed our hair to impersonate our bombastic heroes. We worked on our Atomic Elbow Smashes, Flying Drop Kicks, and personalized submission holds.

To us, WWWF wrestling was the most vivid thing on TV—totally unreal as an athletic event, but entirely dramatic in what it symbolized.

See, quite like Trump’s presidential campaign, 1950s-style pro-wrestling was all about ethnicity and race. I’d bet anything that young Donald Trump was also a fan of the broadcasts from Sunnyside Gardens in Queens, quite close to his childhood home. He appears to have adopted the entire Dr. Jerry Graham playbook as his signature style: the boasting, the strutting, the insults, and the elaborate blonde pompadour too!

Graham was the WWWF showman of the era, masterful at inciting crowds. He’d enter the ring for a tag-team match in a sequined cape accompanied by a mouthy manager and his “brother” Eddie, another bleached-blonde poser.

“I have the body that men fear and women adore,” Graham would say, posing with flexed biceps and his head thrown back haughtily. Never mind that he also had a watermelon belly and comparatively skinny legs to carry it on. The attitude was the thing. He exuded sheer superiority.

Why losers like “Golden Boy” Arnold Skaaland even showed up was beyond Graham’s power to imagine. Billed on TV as “the Jewish Champ,” who the Golden Boy beat to earn that title was unclear. (Skaaland was apparently of Norwegian descent. So what? “Bobo Brazil” came from Little Rock; Hans Schmidt, “The Teuton Terror,” was really Guy Larose of Quebec.)

Dr. Jerry Graham’s gimmick was that he supposedly had a PhD from the University of Arizona, which back then might as well have been on Saturn. See, also like Donald Trump, he was smarter than you.

What kind of doctorate, an announcer once asked?

“He’s a tree surgeon,” Graham’s manager said.

Often on those Sunnyside Gardens TV cards, some more formidable opponent such as Antonino Rocca, the barefoot “Bull of the Pampas,” would be in the audience. Indignant at the Graham Brothers’ dirty tricks, Rocca would leap into the ring to defend their hapless opponents, whereupon the previously supine referee would spring into action, restraining the hero while the bad guys went to work with beer pitchers, blades concealed in their trunks, whatever.

Theatrical blood flowed freely.

However, if you wanted to see Antonino Rocca get his revenge, you had to buy a ticket to Madison Square Garden. One of the great grudge matches of the era took place there in November 1957, when Dr. Graham and Dick the Bruiser took on Rocca and Édouard “The Flying Frenchman” Carpentier. A riot erupted. Hundreds of fans got arrested. Several cops got hurt by flying chairs. Order was restored only after Rocca stood on the ring ropes saluting the “Star Spangled Banner.” It made the front page of the New York Times.

So you bet I’m looking forward to Thursday’s Fox News debate, featuring Trump versus a bunch of Koch brothers marionettes, as he recently dubbed them. Would anybody be astonished to see The Donald enter wearing a sequined robe?

If he voted at all, my Grandfather Connors certainly never voted Republican. But he’d never have missed the show.

It’s sure to be HUGE!

Donald Trump Photo: U.S. Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump listens to a question at the Family Leadership Summit in Ames, Iowa, United States, July 18, 2015. REUTERS/Jim Young.