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Thursday, July 19, 2018

Corporations are people too, and people get their feelings hurt. What’s more, the richer they are these days, the more sensitive they seem to be. It’s reminiscent of that Hans Christian Anderson story of the “Princess and the Pea.” You know, where the tender young virgin is so delicate that a single pea hidden under seven feather mattresses keeps her awake all night. That’s how the prince satisfies himself that she’s a real aristocrat.

So it is with Mitt Romney, GOP presidential candidate and one-time corporate buccaneer. When Romney’s not running around boasting about his enormous success running Bain Capital and accusing others of envying the vast wealth he’s got stashed in numbered accounts in Switzerland and the Cayman Islands, his tender sensibilities are constantly being offended by peasants whining about lost jobs and stolen pensions.

Why do they hate America?

Anyway, his thin skin is how you know Romney’s an aristocrat. Ever since reckless gambling by Wall Street investment bankers cratered the world economy back in 2008, their collective self-pity has been something to see. It’s not enough that taxpayers should bail them out, and then watch them go back to awarding each other multi-million dollar bonuses like one of those children’s athletic programs where everybody gets a trophy.

Evidently, it’s our patriotic duty to pretend that nothing ever happened, and to reject attempts to regulate Wall Street both as an impediment to genius and an assault upon capitalism itself. Hence the Romney candidacy—yet another GOP prep school cheerleader, and a credit to his social class.