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Wednesday, October 26, 2016

Welcome to “This Week In Crazy,” The National Memo’s weekly update on the wildest attacks, conspiracy theories, and other loony behavior from the increasingly unhinged right wing. Starting with number five:

5. The American Family Association

October has seen several big steps forward for the gay rights movement — and the American Family Association is handling the news just about as well as you might think.

On Monday, the anti-gay hate group’s director of issues analysis, Bryan Fischer, took to his radio show to declare that “the Mark of the Beast today is the rainbow flag.”

As Fischer’s argument goes, Christian businessmen who refuse to serve gay customers are now “not allowed to engage in commerce because they would not take the Mark of the Beast on their hands or on their foreheads,” and as a consequence, they are literally slaves:

But Fischer’s concerns pale in comparison to those of his boss, AFA president Tim Wildmon. In an email to supporters on Tuesday, which was flagged by Right Wing Watch, Wildmon warned that Christians in America now face “mandatory gay brain-washing.”

“Homosexual activists are now intentionally seeking out Christian business owners for the sole purpose of attacking and destroying religious liberties,” Wildmon warns.

Conveniently, Wildmon goes on to share an easy way that Christians can save their faith, and the country: buying one of the AFA’s DVDs.

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  • Had Louie Gohmert any shred of humanity in him, he might instead be demanding to know why a hospital in his home state had no protocol for Ebola even when he, along with half of all Texas Republicans, have been screaming their heads off that immigrants and terrorists are bringing deadly diseases with them across the border for years.

    But no, as usual, it’s petty partisan politics first, the safety and security of your constituents second for Louie Gohmert.

    • The_Magic_M

      States’ rights! But also Obama’s fault because big govt did not do what big govt should do, uh, should not do, uh… – or something!

      In other words, Texas shows us what it looks like if a state keeps its hand out of health care issues.

    • ScotDog

      Gohmert and Beck in one room. Imagine how many flies that would accumulate over those two piles.

    • idamag

      And, if he was a decent person, he would try to be part of the solution, not the problem.

  • ericlipps

    Rep. Steve Rep. Steve Vaillancourt is the perfect example of the sort of bozos driving the GOP clown car these days. Even the Republican candidate he thought he was “helping” by praising her good looks while viciously mocking those of her opponent couldn’t swallow his remarks, and for good reason: Vaillancourt was essentially urging voters to pick his favorite because she’s pretty, not because she’s better suited to the job.

  • FireBaron

    Columbus was searching for gold because Their Most Catholic Majesties, Ferdinand and Isabella, bankrupted their respective countries (Aragon and Castille) in their effort to unite Spain and kick out the last of the Moorish kingdoms (Grenada).
    Columbus knew about a land to the West from reports of fishermen. They saw the land while working what we now call George’s Bank and Grand Banks. However, Columbus based his theory on the size of the world on Aristotle’s theory, not Ptolomey Strabo’s. If he did, he would have realized he had not reached what is now known as Indonesia, but an unknown landmass between there and the Eurasian/African landmass.
    So, Columbus didn’t really know where he was going. He didn’t know where he was when he got there. When he got back, he really didn’t know where he had been. And he got someone else to pay for it. Sounds just like a Republican “Fact-Finding” mission.

    • latebloomingrandma

      He was a victim of all those unknown unknowns.

    • idamag

      You are a history buff. Because the Moors were keeping the Spaniards, Portugese, and Italians from getting to India safely, Columbus was looking for another route to India to facilitate the spice trade. He did go looking for gold, when he reached the Caribbean. His, and Pissaro’s, actions toward the natives were brutal. I visited a couple of mines where the natives were sent crawling into tiny holes. In one, there was steps carved that were less than a foot wide and no handrails. Many of the native slaves fell to their deaths. Yes, they were seeking to build wealth.

    • hicusdicus

      The one thing a political fact finding mission does either GOP or DEM is spend a lot of money, have a good time and conjure up most of the facts.

    • charleo1

      I like that one a lot, FireBaron! Informative, interesting, funny, and true!

  • Grannysmovin

    The American Family Association: Proof again that organized religion is nothing more than a business. Of course Wildmon had to use salvation and fear to sell God on DVDs.

    Steve Vaillancourt: This troll best remember people who live in “ugly” glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.

    Louie Gohmert: Perhaps in High School they used Gohmert as the football and that would explain his mental challenges.

    Ron Johnson: I think the real and present danger is Johnson and his fellow Republican spewing fear and hate at every turn.

    Kenyn Cureton: Cureton is this weeks lead Wacko at the ”Wackadoo Zoo”.

  • The_Magic_M

    So obviously killing and enslaving all those “savages” was a good deed because Christianity.
    I bet Cureton also loves slavery and the Holocaust, the former because it was so good for all those black savages to be taken care of, the latter because Hitler just wanted to save Christian Europe from all those ebil Jooish Joos Who Killed Our Saviour [tm]. Or something.

    But it’s even more disgusting how much the GOP panders to these types of people only to win a couple of votes (they wouldn’t vote Democratic anyway, so there).
    Keep this in mind when asking yourself why nobody stopped Hitler long before his movement became a majority.

    • ScotDog

      More than likely he wasn’t Christian, but said he was to avoid death. Almost like politicians who say they are just to be elected.

      • Allan Richardson

        There have been some scholars who have raised the question of whether Columbus was Jewish, and even whether he was really Italian. Nothing conclusive after five centuries, but highly suggestive evidence.

  • idamag

    Brian Fischer, hate is not a family value. Massachusetts, how could you send such a hateful person to Washington? I’ve never thought of Massachusetts as a hateful state. I guess you do have a pocket of nasty and ugly in your state.
    Gohmert, you are one of the dumbest people around. You politicize everything and do nothing. It is the hospital in your state that sent the patient home to expose a lot of other people.

    • Independent1

      That’s the kind of blunders that health care people make when they’re part of the worst health care delivery system in America; a designation that Texas received for 2013.

  • tdm3624

    I would love to see Columbus day renamed something else that more people would have a connection to.

  • Sand_Cat

    If Dr. Cureton had any sense, he’d want Columbus removed from the “Christian” rolls, though people like the good doctor do far more damage to Christianity than any Satanist could hope to.

  • charleo1

    “4 days ago – 4 ISIS Terrorists Arrested in Texas in Last 36 Hours … Duncan Hunter of California, told Fox News’ Greta Van Susteren that … I know that at least ten ISIS fighters have been caught coming across the Mexican border in Texas.” Ever wonder why the nut jobs are well, nut jobs? They sit around, and watch this crap on Fox News everyday! There really ought to be a law.

  • adp3d

    I wonder how long it will be before the word gets out of re-animated ebola victims raising from the grave in Africa….?

    • Allan Richardson

      Considering that right wing “thinking” is based on free association rather than logic, and in their minds Ebola = African disease = disease of African people = people like Haitians = voodoo is from Haiti = voodoo makes zombies, I’m surprised it hasn’t happened already. But since George H. W. Bush called Reagan’s trickle down theory “voodoo economics” (until he was bought out with the VP job), maybe Bush and Reagan were Haitian voodoo priests in disguise? And the last 30 years of right wing economic policies were actually a voodoo curse, so that Americans would understand how poor the Haitian people are, by becoming that poor ourselves?

  • Effie Trinket

    One of Obama’s apparatchik nominees claims that US taxpayers are somehow magically obligated to pay for baby murder.

    • Allan Richardson

      We have been paying for baby murders at least since 1941. We could not have won that war without bombing civilian targets and killing thousands of babies (along with adults who were not involved in their country’s fighting). The Manhattan Project led to the killing of most of the population of two large cities. It was necessary, but we should not pretend it was innocent. Throughout the Cold War, the little “skirmishes” and the long term “quagmires” often put our GIs in the position of killing innocent civilians.

      Compared to that, preventing a fertilized egg from developing into a deformed baby, or a doomed source of infection for the woman who conceived it, or a child who would be raised amidst poverty, resentment about the rape which caused it, parental incompetence, etc. BEFORE it grows a brain with which to feel or think, is much lower on the scale of evil; not the IDEAL outcome but the LEAST BAD outcome. And trying to fight THAT option by ALSO fighting the option to prevent the conception in the first place, and fighting access to other life saving medical services, is like closing all the grocery stores to prevent overeating.

  • ayungclas

    I love it when Bryan Fischer makes “This Week in Crazy”. It’s like the “Onion” in real life.

  • Allan Richardson

    Attractive vs unattractive candidates? Beauty comes from behavior as much as from the “shape of the skin” (Pat Paulsen’s phrase from his 1968 mock Presidential campaign). Eleanor Roosevelt may not have been an attractive looking woman, but she was as beautiful on the inside as Mrs. Kennedy or Mrs. Obama, both of whom show both inside and outside beauty, because she cared about the rights of ALL Americans. That is why the right wing hated her and bombed the Temple in Atlanta after she visited it with her Jewish friends.

    Not being able to mistreat gay people tramples on the rights of Christians? The Jesus I know loves ALL people, and never abused anyone. As for the numerological conspirators, ever notice the 666xx is the range of zip codes in Topeka, Kansas? Perhaps the “antichrist” is really the “phony christ” who preaches hate in the name of God.

    Ebola is a disease found in nature, and humans know how to prevent its spread, and will someday (probably soon, now that it has so much attention) know how to cure it and render people immune to it. It is an embarrassment to the right wing because it shows the weakness of purely privatized health care (just as the Chicago fire showed the weakness of purely privatized firefighting). This causes them to run off on tangents to distract from the FACT that they have prevented adequate funding of our national public health agencies, AND the UN’s WHO via our withheld UN dues, AND the regular health care system which keeps out of the hospital the very people whom we NEED, for ALL OF OUR SAKES, to get INTO the hospital. The Chicago fire and similar disasters led to our “socialized firefighting” system of taxpayer funded fire departments which do not charge premiums upfront to put out fires, or send bills afterward, because the fire that had consumed enough buildings that were NOT insured was too big to put out when it got to the INSURED buildings. And someday we will realize that health care should be run the same way to make us all safer and healthier.

    Cureton’s theory about Columbus’ motives, and those of his patrons the King and Queen of the Inquisition, sound similar to those of today’s right wing “Christian” (more like “ChrISIStians”), and their ethical compass is similarly attracted to evil. Slavery is OK if it gets gold to kill non-Christians and forces the slaves to accept Christianity, showing the “love” of Christ. And violating the Ninth Commandment on political opponents is OK because, you know, you are “lying for the sake of the Truth.”

  • Joker Davis

    Under Obama’s criminal regime, military NCOs who question the notion of sodomite marriage are subject to vicious attacks.

  • Charlie Dalton

    In 2013, Obama’s marxist regime attacked a Young Marines chapter in Louisiana because their oath mentioned God.