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Monday, December 09, 2019 {{ new Date().getDay() }}

In a tour de force appearance, Jon Stewart swept dramatically onto The Late Show set, with what appeared to be a muskrat on his head and a long red necktie trailing him like a royal train.

Startled by the sudden entrance of his old boss, host Stephen Colbert, inquired gently about Stewart’s unusual costume — had he dressed up in homage to President Trump?

“This is how I’m going to dress now,” he declared. “The president sets men’s fashion, and I saw the inauguration: super-long red tie, dead animal on head! Boom!”

What Stewart brought along with him — aside from his usual difficulty suppressing laughter and staying in character — was an exclusive set of forthcoming Trump White House executive orders. He offered a surprise solution to the impossible difficulties of building the border wall, including a sneaky way to make Mexico pay, and proclaimed a new official language for the United States (not English).

“It’s been 11 f**king days, Stephen,” said the former Daily Show host. “The presidency is supposed to exhaust the president, not the public, but we have never faced this before: purposeful vindictive chaos.” He had some strong words about how Americans can save their republic — and what reward the nation will enjoy, if somehow we do.

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Donald Trump

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The FBI on Monday executed a search warrant at Mar-a-Lago, Donald Trump‘s Florida home. While there are few details yet on what federal agents are investigating, Trump quickly put out a statement in which he decries the “assault.”

“These are dark times for our Nation,” writes Trump, who since becoming president has likened himself to the entire country, at times declaring an attack on him to be an attack on the United States.

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Jesse Watters

Shortly before 7 p.m. ET on Monday night, former President Donald Trump issued a press release confirming that the FBI had conducted a “raid” of the Mar-a-Lago resort which serves as one of his residences.

Details are scarce. Trump had been enmeshed in a long list of criminal probes at the time of the search, but The New York Times and The Washington Post are both reporting that the search was related to the former president’s potentially illegal removal of classified documents from the White House at the conclusion of his term, with the Post’s source stating it was “court-ordered.” The FBI and Justice Department have declined comment, following their typical procedure for press requests confirming active federal investigations.

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