This Week In Crazy: ‘Bridgegate’ Is The Least Of Christie’s Concerns, And The Rest Of The Worst Of The Right

Welcome to “This Week In Crazy,” The National Memo’s weekly update on the wildest attacks, conspiracy theories, and other loony behavior from the increasingly unhinged right wing. Starting with number five:

5. Reince Priebus

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Photo: Gage Skidmore via Flickr

Supposed false-flag operations are a pretty common theme in This Week In Crazy, but the accusations usually come from someone in the Alex Jones set — not the chairman of the Republican National Committee.

But on Wednesday, RNC chair Reince Priebus launched a conspiracy that would have fit snugly into Glenn Beck’s show when he suggested that Democrats don’t actually want to extend unemployment insurance to the estimated 1.3 million workers whose federal aid lapsed at the end of the December. No, the entire Democratic caucus actually voted to extend benefits to distract America from — you guessed it — Obamacare.

“All of this kind of stuff is ridiculous because we’re spending all of our time actually talking and perpetrating what the Democrats actually want,” Priebus told host Lars Larson during an appearance on his radio show. “They don’t want this to pass, what they want to do is they want to talk about these things, they want to talk about minimum wage and what they want to do ultimately is create a campaign issue, this sort of rich vs. poor, the same old thing they can do and avoid Obamacare. That’s what they want.”

Audio of his comments is available below, via Right Wing Watch

Here’s the most impressive thing about Priebus’ theory that Democrats secretly oppose unemployment insurance, but will go to any lengths — even helping jobless Americans! — to distract from Obamacare: It wasn’t even the craziest thing to happen on Larson’s radio show on Wednesday.

4. Jim Inhofe

Jim Inhofe

That honor belongs to Senator Jim Inhofe (R-OK), who dipped into Michele Bachmann territory when he told Larson that President Obama “is on the other side” of the War on Terror.

“When you look at what this president has done in Egypt, in Syria, in Libya, in Iraq, in other places, it’s almost like he’s on the other side,” Larson suggested to Inhofe during a segment on the fight against terrorism.

“Well, don’t forget Iran,” Inhofe insisted.

“I have to agree with you,” the Oklahoma senator continued. “I’m not a conspirator either but I wonder, there’s such a repetition, we are over and over again, it’s always — the other guys are always the good guys and we’re the bad guys. Then you look at it through the eyes of the Israelis — Netanyahu shakes his head and wonders why in the world we didn’t learn on 9/11 that the threat is out there and it’s very real — so I’m with you.”

There’s plenty to unpack in the reliably unhinged Inhofe’s suggestion that Obama is basically President Nicholas Brody — for example, the al Qaeda leaders who have been killed in drone strikes that Inhofe loves presumably disagree that the president is on their side — but the most laughable claim that the senator made has to be that he’s “not a conspirator.”

3. Rush Limbaugh

Rush Limbaugh checks in at number three for a bit of political analysis that makes Dick Morris look downright clairvoyant by comparison.

According to Limbaugh, New Jersey governor Chris Christie is now damaged goods. But not because of the George Washington Bridge scandal that has rocked his administration. “I don’t know what the lasting impact of that is gonna be,” Limbaugh says.

No, according to Rush, Christie ruined his political fortunes…by appearing with President Obama on the Atlantic City boardwalk.

Of course, given that Chris Christie cruised to re-election with 60 percent of the vote five months after appearing with Obama, it’s tempting to call Limbaugh’s theory insane. But then again, it wouldn’t be the first time that Limbaugh clunkily — but accurately — predicted a Republican’s demise.

2. Pat Robertson

Pat Robertson returns to the list at number two, beating out some serious competition for the honor of “stupidest argument against global warming.”

According to the chronically wrong televangelist, it’s cold in most of America right now, and getting warmer on Jupiter — despite the planet’s lack of SUVs — so clearly global warming is a hoax perpetrated by money-hungry scientists.

No, really. That’s his argument:

In fairness, Robertson is right that money is driving the environmental debate in America — but the “river of money” certainly isn’t flowing towards scientists.

1. Jerome Corsi

jones corsi

This week’s “winner” is birther movement founding father Jerome Corsi, who has found something even crazier than challenging Barack Obama’s birth certificate: Challenging Adolf Hitler’s death certificate.

In his new book, which was recently promoted by — who else? — WorldNetDaily, Corsi shares the shocking truth about the Nazi dictator. “The story Hitler and Eva Braun committed suicide was a cover story, designed by U.S. intelligence agents at the end of World War II to facilitate the escape not only of Hitler and Eva Braun, but also of top Nazi war criminals such as Adolf Eichmann who was discovered in 1960 hiding in Argentina,” Corsi writes.

Why would the Americans want to help Hitler escape? Well, he never quite gets to that part. But he does provide “scientific” evidence for his theory, such as “There are no photographs documenting a joint suicide of Hitler and Eva Braun.” Are you ready to open your eyes, sheeple?

Corsi also points to Argentinian media reports of Hitler sightings — which should count as scientific, since everything you read in the media is true.

Unfortunately for Corsi, as the good folks at Wonkettepoint out, actual academic sources easily disprove the Hitler Survival Myth. But at least he still has WorldNetDaily in his corner. As of Thursday evening, just 4 percent of voters on the site answered the poll question “Did Hitler Really Commit Suicide In His Bunker In 1945?” affirmatively. More popular answers included “No, I’ve long suspected Hilter escaped his bunker,” “No, the evidence is just too circumspect to believe he died there,” and “As Hillary Clinton would say, ‘What difference does it make?'”

Check out previous editions of This Week In Crazy here. Think we missed something? Let us know in the comments!

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