Five ‘Celebrities’ On Team Mitt

In both 2008 and 2012, President Obama’s opponents have attacked him for being a “celebrity.” It’s an easy case to make. He’s one of the most famous men in the world. And his supporters include George Clooney, Beyonce, Eva Longoria and dozens of the biggest names in the decadent, fuming wasteland of Hollywood.

Sure you’ve know billionaires who support Romney like Donald Trump—who is on his second foreign born wife. And you have the right’s own billionaire-supported celebrities the right nurtures like Ann Coulter, Glenn Beck and Michelle Malkin who would support a large chunk of cotton candy if the GOP ran it for president. But the actual celebrities who really support Romney in some ways resemble the tea party—a bit hypocritical, somewhat delusional and desperate to find someone to blame for their problems.

Here are five celebrities who don’t care if Mitt ever releases his taxes returns. They’re voting Romney no mater what. (SPOILER: This list doesn’t include tea partying former SNL star Victoria Jackson. Last we heard, she thinks Romney is a “socialist.”)

Jenna Jameson

Jameson, the “Queen of Porn,” is probably the world’s richest porn star. She could also be a Romney political adviser because she has come up with a perfect slogan for the campaign: “When you’re rich, you want a Republican in office.” The winner of 30 more than the adult video awards and star “Up and Cummers 11” and “I Love Lesbians” would definitely be a part of the top 5% of Americans who would pay less under Mitt Romney’s tax plan. The twice divorced star once modeled for PETA but is apparently now more interested in the ethical treatment of millionaires.

Scott Baio

Famous for being Happy Days’ Chachi, Charles in Charge, and being 45 and single. In 2010 he tweeting an unflattering picture of the First Lady with the comment “WOW He wakes up to this every morning.” When he was called racist and sexist for the remark he listed his impeccable non-racist credentials. For instance, his wife’s best friend is black. A noted womanizer for more than twenty years, the now-married Baio recently appeared at a Romney fundraiser in Los Angeles to keep the faith with Mitt.

The Ghost of Kid Rock Past and The Ghost of Ted Nugent Future

Gun lover Ted Nugent has a couple things in common with Mitt Romney. They both avoided the Vietnam Draft and they were both born in Michigan. Nugent has become the one outspoken classic rock era spokesman for conservative culture after a youth spent sewing more wild oats than the Quaker pilgrim. Kid Rock was also born in Michigan and is a 90s version of Nugent, a high-energy appropriator of black culture with a long blonde mane. Both Nugent and Rock have endorsed Romney. There’s no word on whether they think Mitt’s “the trees are the right height” comment was a pot reference.

Gene Simmons

The front man of the band Kiss, who allegedly bedded nearly 5,000 women, is famous for marketing anything that can fit the Kiss logo on it. He claims he voted for Obama because he wanted “to show the world that America, the land of slaves, the land that tortured its black population for hundreds of years, is also the place that could give an African American man the chance to lead the most powerful nation on the planet.” He now supports Romney because “America is a business and should be run by a businessman.” That’s what Hoover voters thought, too. There’s no confirmation from the Romney camp on whether a President Romney would market coffins and credit cards with the American flag on them as Simmons has done with the Kiss logo.

Rick Schroder

Mitt Romney will be fundraising with the former star of television’s “Silver Spoons” this weekend. Schroder — a Mormon convert and family man — wasn’t born with a proverbial silver spoon in his mouth, unlike Romney, Donald Trump and the Koch brothers. But his most famous role and new connection to Romney proved to be irresistible to the liberal group Americans United who put together the video above.


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