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Monday, December 09, 2019 {{ new Date().getDay() }}

Last night, Cartoon Donald Trump staged a glorious return to The Late Show with Stephen Colbert to defend his dismal polling numbers in Wisconsin, threaten to “spill the beans” about the host, and hint that Ted Cruz’s supporters “will have to be punished.”

When Trump’s animated doppelgänger first appeared on the show last week, Colbert announced he had “invited a slightly less cartoonish version” of the real thing, and the conversation didn’t disappoint. The pair bickered about Trump’s acting like a 5-year-old — “I know you are, but what am I?” — and his tic for litigation — “I’m rubber, you’re glue. I have a lawyer and I will sue.”

And no, it wasn’t nearly as cartoonish as real life.

Have we fallen into an alternate political universe in which cartoonish outrage means political viability? Do voters, deep down, just want a show?

If Cartoon Trump’s namesake makes it to the Oval Office, we’ll have four years to find out.

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My Brother, Still

When my brother was a boy, he loved to leave pennies on the railroad tracks up the street from our house and wait for the freight train to flatten them as it zoomed by.

This scared my mother to death. I don't know that she ever found a flattened penny in the pocket of his jeans or heard it rattling around in the clothes dryer. More likely, she got regular dispatches from the neighborhood gossips reporting for duty.

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