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Monday, December 09, 2019 {{ new Date().getDay() }}

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At “Congressmen’s Wearhouse,” millionaires — not billionaires — can afford their own candidate. Candidates are available for custom-order, based on issues and stances: from open carry to denying climate change.

“All the latest styles, at prices you can afford,” promises the company’s CEO, in a perfect deadpan parody of Men’s Wearhouse former CEO George Zimmer, who has appeared in the retailer’s commercials for years.

Even better: “Congressmen’s Wearhouse” takes anything that remotely resembles money. Even Bitcoin. Boris Polanoff, who voices the ad, is part of the New York City-based Big Bad Boris.

“You’re going to like the way they vote,” he promises. “I guarantee it.”

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Danziger Draws

Jeff Danziger lives in New York City. He is represented by CWS Syndicate and the Washington Post Writers Group. He is the recipient of the Herblock Prize and the Thomas Nast (Landau) Prize. He served in the US Army in Vietnam and was awarded the Bronze Star.