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Welcome to “This Week In Crazy,”  The National Memo’s weekly update on the wildest attacks, conspiracy theories, and other loony behavior from the increasingly unhinged right wing. Starting with number five:

5. Dinesh D’Souza

D'Souza may want to get used to this outfit

D’Souza may want to get used to this outfit

Right-wing activist Dinesh D’Souza, who is apparently not yet in prison, brought his latest book tour to Fox News’ The Kelly File on Monday night.

Things got weird.

D’Souza started with his standard shtick on how President Obama secretly views America as “exceptionally evil.”

“I think with Obama you have a president who in a sense views his job as one of containing, or curtailing, the power of his own country,” D’Souza argued. To her credit, Kelly — who’s hardly an admirer of the president’s — found this charge to make no sense at all.

“It sounds like you’re accusing him of being almost anti-American,” Kelly said. “If he were anti-American, if he didn’t love his country, why would he want to be president of it?”

“Well, look at it this way,” D’Souza replied. “It’s almost like this: If I was in a family and I believed my dad was some kind of a serial killer or a child molester, I would still love him. He would be part of my family, but I’d do everything I could to prevent him from doing evil actions.”

“I would think that would not only be good for the world, but good for my dad. So with Obama, he believes he’s doing the world a favor and America a favor by controlling this rogue elephant that is the United States.”

“So America is the child molester in this scenario?” Kelly replied with a laugh. “Just trying to follow, Dinesh. I think we may have jumped off the deep end.”

Pleading guilty to illegally funneling money to the wrong side of the most lopsided election in the history of New York is embarrassing. But having your anti-Obama argument laughed off of Fox News is rock bottom.
4. Bryan Fischer

American Family Association mouthpiece Bryan Fischer has never been big on pluralism, but there is one aspect of Islam that he respects: Sharia law.

On the Tuesday edition of his radio show, Fischer took a call from a listener who insisted that “from my Christian perspective, Sharia law is probably preferable to what we have right now” in America, since it outlaws abortion and “blatant sexuality.”

Fischer agreed, saying that Muslims “rightly accuse the United States of corrupting the morality of the entire world.”

“When they go out and say the United States is the Great Satan because of all the pornography it produces, how do you argue against that, because they are right,” he continued. “That is the work of Satan; we’re producing it, we’re distributing it all over around world, they have every right to complain about that.”

It makes one wonder why Fischer has such a problem with our secret-Muslim-radical president.

3. Glenn Beck

Right-wing carnival barker Glenn Beck had a rare moment of lucidity this week, when he acknowledged that liberals were right about the Iraq War, and he was wrong.

Don’t give him too much credit, though: He spent the rest of the week as his usual crazy self.

On Monday, Beck revealed his new favored foreign policy: Withdraw all American troops around the world, station them on the U.S. borders to seal them completely (Ron Paul was right!), and tell the rest of the world “if you screw with us, we will pound you into glass.”

On Tuesday, he declared that President Obama will not provide military support to the Iraqi government, because he “believes the world would be a safer place if a caliphate would happen over there” (although he also suggested that if Obama does send troops, it would be because his progressive “overlords” are “pulling his strings”).

But nothing tops last Friday, when he fretted that the media is about to turn on President Obama, causing him to snap — and launch a stress holocaust.

Much like Nazi Germany, Beck warned that “we’ve been watering seeds that there’s two classes of Americans — there are the white people and the black people, there are the conservatives and the liberals, there are those enemies of the president that need to be punished.”

“I warn you, both sides are doing that right now. And the one, whoever in the end is in power, could very easily round up the other group and put them in a camp,” he added.

“We are headed towards a time when the president is not going to react well,” Beck continued. “And if you couple that with power, you’re in trouble.”



2. Rush Limbaugh

It may not shock you to learn that Rush Limbaugh was not satisfied with President Obama’s announcement that the U.S. had captured the alleged mastermind of the 2012 Benghazi attacks.

Instead, the talk-radio blowhard who taught us the horrible truth about The Dark Knight, and introduced the world to shoe trutherism (among other inane conspiracies) revealed the why Ahmed Abu Khatallah was really arrested.

“Isn’t it an amazing timely coincidence that they have found a militia leader of the Benghazi attack and they’ve arrested him?” Limbaugh mused on the Tuesday edition of his show. “Isn’t this amazing timing?”

“So I guess the video really wasn’t to blame,” he added, apparently unaware that Khatallah reportedly said that the video did, in fact, help motivate the attack. “It’s quite obvious that this is a very timely headline, given how things are falling apart in Iraq.”

“Isn’t it fortunate that President Obama get a headline using the military when he really needs one?” Limbaugh added. “I’m waiting for FBI special forces to capture Lois Lerner’s missing emails.”

On the plus side, I guess Valerie Jarrett’s off the hook.

1. Allen West

Gage Skidmore via Flickr

Gage Skidmore via Flickr

Ridiculous as it may be, Limbaugh’s conspiracy theory falls short of this week’s “winner,” increasingly deranged former congressman Allen West.

On Wednesday, West joined fellow This Week In Crazy favorite Rick Wiles for an interview that was exactly as insane as you’d hope/fear.

“Do you think Barack Obama is secretly aiding the rise of an Islamic caliphate?” Wiles asked West.

“I don’t think it is secretly happening,” West replied. Things snowballed downhill from there.

“We don’t really know who this President Obama is and I’m not talking about his birth certificate. We don’t know who he is, we don’t know about his college transcripts, we don’t know what he was doing in Pakistan when he was back in college and who funded him to go over to Pakistan,” West said. “You just look at some of the Muslim Brotherhood-affiliated individuals that are in his administration. That’s a clear, open-and-shut case.”

After Wiles asked if Obama is the “ultimate jihadist,” West insisted that he “has without a doubt sided with Islamists.”

“I believe Barack Obama has an eastern orientation, not a western civilization orientation,” he added.

West then went on to explain how Obama is supporting both Sunni Muslim terrorists and Shia Muslims in Iran, as part of a wider movement in which Saudi Arabia, Iran, and Turkey will “come together” to form a “radical Islamist empire.”

Why would Obama allow all of this to happen? West is glad you asked.

“If you’re familiar with the Cloward-Piven strategy…he’s following right along with that,” West said. “When you talk about fundamentally transforming the United States of America, which is what he said five days before the 2008 election, well that means you are trying to fundamentally destroy, transform, subvert America as a constitutional republic. That’s not even debatable.”

Which is a real shame for those of us who love any debate involving Rick Wiles.

Audio of the interview can be heard at Right Wing Watch.

Check out previous editions of This Week In Crazy here. Think we missed something? Let us know in the comments!

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