Poor, poor Minnesota Republicans. All they want to do is install a hardliner MAGA chud like their endorsed candidate for governor, Kendall Qualls, atop a blue state that has vexed President Donald Trump mightily. But Trump himself created the problem they now face, and that problem is named Mike Lindell.

Trump endorsed the hapless pillow salesman/world champion election denier for the governor gig, and Lindell has proved nothing but trouble. Hilarious trouble.

Now, with Minnesota’s primary only one week out and Lindell leading in multiple polls, the state GOP has to do something. In a hilarious bit of political theater, they are now begging the Democratic Minnesota Secretary of State Steve Simon, whom they loathe, to rescue them from Lindell.

The state GOP chair wrote to Simon late last month to “request urgent guidance from your office regarding the constitutional residency standard applicable to candidates for Governor.”

Wait, is this about how Lindell seems to have been registered to vote in Texas, and not registered in Minnesota, up until just a few weeks ago? Nope! This is a different Lindell problem.

Per the chair, “serious questions” have been raised about Lindell’s residence eligibility and the GOP is very concerned about “the need to ensure that the standard applied is clear, uniform, and consistent with the text of the Minnesota Constitution.”

LOL, come on. You know full well that if Lindell were not a walking chaos machine and stood an actual chance of winning if he got the GOP nod, the state Republicans would be howling with rage if anyone besmirched the honor of Lindell and where Lindell insists he lives. Instead, they’re performatively fretting, informing Simon that “the Lindell Campaign appears to rely on a constitutional provision that does not exist rather than dispute whether they meet the actual standard in the Minnesota Constitution."

A … constitutional provision … that does not exist. Whew. We’re gonna have to work up to that. Let’s start where the state GOP starts instead.

Minnesota’s residency requirement in the affidavit for candidacy for governor reads “I will be at least 25 years old on the first Monday of the next January and a resident of Minnesota for not less than one year on Election day.”

Much as it pains us to agree with Minnesota Republicans, that seems pretty straightforward: Lindell would have to be a resident of Minnesota for not less than one year come Election Day, November 3, 2026.

But Lindell’s lt. governor running mate, Phillip Parrish, has advanced a novel reading of this, saying that Lindell’s fine and only needs to have been a resident one year before the date he takes office, because of the actual text of the Minnesota Constitution, Article V, Section 3, which Parrish quotes:

The governor and lieutenant governor shall be elected for a term of four years. They shall be elected on the first Tuesday after the first Monday in November in the year 1958 and every four years thereafter. They shall be elected by the qualified electors of the state. To be eligible for the office of governor or lieutenant governor a person must have attained the age of 25 years and, at the time of taking office, must have been a resident of Minnesota for one year.

Article V, Section 3 of the Minnesota Constitution is actually about the powers and duties of the governor and says nothing about residency requirements at all, but maybe Parrish just got his cite wrong?

Urm, nope. Article V, Section 2 is about qualifications, but doesn’t say what Parrish says it does. Rather, it says this:

The term of office for the governor and lieutenant governor is four years and until a successor is chosen and qualified. Each shall have attained the age of 25 years and, shall have been a bona fide resident of the state for one year next preceding his election, and shall be a citizen of the United States.

Setting aside the fact that it seems like kind of a big problem that your running mate is just making up constitutional provisions, what’s the big deal about whether Lindell is required to have lived in the state for one year before Election Day in November 2026 versus one year before when he would assume office in January 2027?

And you see, the state GOP is doing this for everyone, out of the goodness of their heart, stating:

The Republican Party of Minnesota anticipates that the D.F.L. Party will file a complaint before the Minnesota Supreme Court challenging Mike Lindell’s residency and eligibility to hold office. The Republican Party of Minnesota does not want Minnesotans who vote for any candidate for Governor to find, after the fact, that their vote was effectively wasted because the candidate did not meet a constitutional qualification that could and should have been clarified in advance.

Translation: Dear Democratic Secretary of State, please, please, please save us from ourselves and our cult leader whom we won’t stand up to and get rid of this walking nightmare on a residency technicality so we don’t have to openly defy Trump.

Of course, Lindell has far more problems than this: He was uncertain whether he was registered to vote in Minnesota. He’s drowning in millions in court judgments. He’s facing a credible campaign finance complaint. He’s a real winner all around.

Trump sure can pick 'em.

Reprinted with permission from Daily Kos