Tag: late night
Endorse This! Colbert Tears Into Steve Bannon

Endorse This! Colbert Tears Into Steve Bannon

The criminal trial of disheveled white nationalist Steve Bannon commenced this week after prosecutors presented evidence that the Trump confidante never actually had the executive privilege he claimed kept him from complying with the investigation into the January 6 attack on the Capitol.

So Late Show host Stephen Colbert weighed in on the oleaginous worm that is Steve Bannon.

“I mean, wow, he really hung Bannon out to dry,” Stephen Colbert said of Trump on Tuesday. “Which isn’t easy, because he excretes a thick layer of sebum.”

Colbert continued: “Finally, Bannon can tell the former president’s side of the story. [Imitating Bannon] ‘Mr. Chairman, this is all a simple misunderstanding. The president didn’t mean to grab the steering wheel from the Secret Service — he just thought it was a big black doughnut!’"

Watch the entire segment below:

#EndorseThis: A Livid Colbert Lays Into Leaked SCOTUS Abortion Opinon

#EndorseThis: A Livid Colbert Lays Into Leaked SCOTUS Abortion Opinon

After a leaked SCOTUS draft opinion revealed the conservative court majority's intention to do what every person of sound mind knew they would do in ending abortion rights, believers in choice became incensed and immediately started protesting. Late Show host Stephen Colbert was none too pleased with the leaked opinion.

“So congratulations, ladies,” Colbert told his viewers. “Decisions about what you can do with your body are now being made by four old dudes and a woman who thinks The Handmaid’s Tale is a rom-com.”

Colbert directed most of his ire at Senator Susan Collins (R-ME). Perpetually duped by far-right-wing SCOTUS nominees and their Christian Taliban agenda, Collins voted to confirm Trump-nominated justices Neil Gorsuch and Brett Kavanaugh.She stupidly said at the time she didn’t believe either would overturn the landmark abortion case. This lady really needs to have a sign above her flashing the words "Not getting it."

Watch The Entire Segment Below:

Endorse This: Colbert Hilariously Explains Why Trump Endorsed Dr. Oz (VIDEO)

Endorse This: Colbert Hilariously Explains Why Trump Endorsed Dr. Oz (VIDEO)

When it comes to being a con man and charlatan, former defeated President Trump takes the whole damn bakery. And while there exists a plethora of lying and greedy Republicans, they're all living in amateur land compared to the former guy.

However, pseudo-science TV host and noted quack Dr. Mehmet Oz is a pretty close second, which clearly explains why Trump endorsed his run for Senate in Pennsylvania.

Over the weekend, Trump discussed his Senate endorsement of Oz -- for which Colbert called the former President, “The Douche of Hazard,” while showing a picture of the TV doctor dressed in a tuxedo.\

“There’s news from the former President, The Douche of Hazard. Over the weekend he weighed in on the political future of charlatan and cater waiter holding the hors d’oeuvres tray up with his penis–Dr. Mehmet Oz.” And his reaction to hearing Trump endorsed Oz for a Senate seat, caused him to reveal what he thinks is their true nature. “Come on, he’s a con man, and so is Doctor Oz!”

Colbert then went on to list all the scams Dr. Oz forced on his audience, "but we only have an hour-long show,” he said. “Among the many snake oil supplements he has peddled are: raspberry ketones for fat burning, lavender soap for leg cramps, and strawberries for teeth whitening. None of these work of course.”

Watch the segment below:

Jimmy Kimmel

#EndorseThis: Jimmy Kimmel Roasts Tucker Carlson Crispy For His 'Villain' Laugh

We've all wondered whether Fox News Channel's resident white supremacist Tucker Carlson is actually a human being, but the fascistic host's "villain" laugh is really troubling Jimmy Kimmel.

"What the hell was that?" asked Kimmel about the Carlson laugh (at about 7:30). "It's like there's a little girl trapped in his head, right? He laughs like the villain in the movie who realizes James Bond just put the bomb back on him and he's about to explode."

Then Kimmel played the video again. "What human makes a sound like that?"

The answer: They don't. Jimmy has funny news about the MyPillow guy and a Chris Christie snap, too. Click and cackle!

MyPillow Mike is Booked on Kimmel, Tucker Carlson's Creepy Laugh & Chris Christie for Prezwww.youtube.com