Birther Congressman Ted Yoho’s Greatest Hits

Ted Yoho -- Intro

Florida congressman Ted Yoho (R) was a relatively unheard-of veterinarian – that is, until he became one of the biggest upset winners of the 2012 election and landed a seat in Washington.

Recently Representative Yoho has garnered widespread attention for his support of Rep. Steve Stockman’s (R-TX) possible “birther” legislation.

The legislation would launch an investigation into President Barack Obama’s birth certificate, which Stockman claims will prove that Obama was not born in the United States, and thus force the president out of office. The birther legislation has now expanded to include an investigation into Obama’s “real” biological mother, who they claim is not actually Stanley Ann Dunham, but wanted terrorist Elizabeth Ann Duke.

Not that any of this matters, because as the son of any American citizen, Obama would still qualify to serve as president of the United States. But Yoho does not really care. He hopped on to the crazy train a long time ago, and time is proving that he has no intentions of hopping off.

Here are some of the controversial right-wing congressman’s greatest hits:

Photo: Gage Skidmore via

Bringing Down The President

Ted Yoho--Birther

Just when you think Yoho is about to make sense – he called the birther legislation a “distraction” from real, serious issues like the economy – he reassures a crowd of people that a birther investigation could bring down the entire government, something he hopes will happen.

“They said if it is true, it’s illegal. He [President Obama] shouldn’t be there and we can get rid of everything he’s done, and I said I agree with that,” Yoho said during a town hall meeting in July.

Photo: Gage Skidmore via

Obamacare Is Racist

When he is not serving the animals of America, Yoho is sharing his storytelling talent with the public.

On Monday, several news sources reported that the congressman had told this story: “I had an Indian doctor in our office the other day, very dark skin, with two non-dark skin people, and I asked this to him, I said, ‘Have you ever been to a tanning booth?’ and he goes, ‘No, no need.’ So therefore it’s a racist tax and I thought I might need to get to a suntanning booth so I can come out and say I’ve been disenfranchised because I got taxed because of the color of my skin.”

Shorter Yoho: The Affordable Care Act is “racist” because it includes a tax on tanning beds.

Yoho even said that he discussed the racist tax with House Speaker and tanning champion John Boehner (R-OH), and claimed that Boehner had conceded, “You know what? It is.”

Boehner’s office was quick to deny that the conversation ever occurred – not that anyone believed Yoho, anyway.

Photo:Im_Having_Trouble_Breathing via

On Same-Sex Marriage


“I think it’s a sad state of affairs in America today that we, as a society, are so confused that we have to redefine what marriage is,” Yoho said at a town hall meeting.

He added: “It’s an institution that’s been around for thousands of years and I feel like it’s ordained by God; are we confused as a country that we have to start redefining these things?”

Yoho is the only one who appears confused.

Photo: Gage Skidmore via

On Food Stamp Funding

Yoho-- FoodStamps

Even though the Tea Party congressman admitted his family used food stamps in the past for about two months, he still backs cutting food stamp funding, which the House GOP just recently severed from the Farm Bill.

Yoho even joked about the 50 million Americans who face food insecurity today: “I think there [are] 330 million people starving, at least three times a day: we call it breakfast, lunch and dinner.”

Just in case that “joke” did not reassure you that food stamp funding cuts are a positive measure for the nation, Yoho reminds you that food aid to those in need has become a “lifestyle,” and makes it too easy for people to qualify.

And, if you’re still not convinced that these cuts are the way to go, Yoho promises that “not one person would lose a calorie or crumb that deserves it.”

Photo: Gage Skidmore via

Hezbollah’s Very Own James Bond


“They call him the 007 of Hezbollah,” said Yoho of a man belonging to the Lebanese group Hezbollah, whom he claims he held a conversation with.

“They call him [007] and find out he’s brought over 1,500 people here illegally that don’t like us, they want to blow us up,” he added.

Say what you will, but Ted Yoho and Hezbollah’s very own James Bond have definitely found the most creative excuse to oppose immigration reform.

Photo: Gage Skidmore via

Military Weaponry Is An American’s ‘Birthright’


In January, the representative gave an interview with The Shark Tank, where he explained his position on gun reform.

“On guns, [my constituents] were saying that the sentiment, when you read the Second Amendment, is that the militia had the same equipment as the military to protect them against the tyrannical government. I think it’s more important today than ever that we uphold our Second Amendment,” explained Yoho.

In Yoho’s world there is no gun reform. And everyone is entitled to a nuke – as he put it, it’s an American’s “birthright.”

Photo:Gage Skidmore via

A True American

Yoho American Flag

Since Ted Yoho was not a household name when he first announced his candidacy, most people had no idea who he was.

A sales manager at a Florida lumber mill, Lee Childers, told Yoho on the campaign trail, “I don’t know how you expect to win with a name like Yoho. I had to look you up to make sure you weren’t a Jap.”

No worries, though: Yoho was not offended that someone would use such a derogatory term when referring to a member of a specific ethnic group, nor was he concerned that a voter would not vote for someone simply because he or she belongs to a particular ethnic group.

Instead, Yoho laughed and decided that he would add his photo to campaign bumperstickers to prevent future confusion over his ethnicity.

Photo:Cristian_RH7 via Flickr

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