What if in 1980 Ayn Rand — the bestselling author and founder of the Objectivist philosophy that professes the virtues of selfishness — became an advice columnist?

Former Daily Show contributor John Hodgman explored this theme in the pages of The New Yorker, and in the video above, he performs the columns hilariously — complete with a musical interlude.

Watch the whole video to get to Ms. Rand’s prophecy of how the Republican Party would become captured by her devotion to avarice:

Because Ronald Reagan has deposed Jimmy Carter, and I predict that by 2013 my influence will be profound, and a new generation of leaders will hallow my name, and devotion to self-interest and capitalism and the free market will not be the exception but the rule, and these leaders will naturally share my disapproval of religion, my support of abortion rights, and my love of Godiva chocolates. I have to stop writing now, because I have chewed through my typewriter.

Here’s a fun fact: Rand actually despised Reagan.