Worrying that your vital information – including your birth date and Social Security number — was pirated from Equifax? Wondering how that could possibly have happened to you and 145 million other blameless Americans?

John Oliver has answers, beginning with the observation that the mammoth credit information company “did everything wrong” – like ignoring the blinking red alert from the Department of Homeland Security last March about a “critical vulnerability” in its software. (And we thought private business was always innately more efficient than government.) They even tweeted out links to a fake phishing site called “securityequifax2017.com”!

Indeed, so incredibly incompetent is Equifax that Last Week Tonight producers were able to set up an “Equifax” phishing site last week.

Oliver provides sound advice about how to protect your data, but he also understands the corporate attitude toward the consumers whose data they sell. “Think of it in terms of Kentucky Fried Chicken: We’re not the guys buying the ten-piece bucket. We’re the fucking chickens!”